Hate

Hate is a big word, and I try NOT to use it. I try NOT to feel it. But sometimes, it seeps out of every pore of my body. It oozes from my soul, and makes me grind my teeth!

I have a co-worker that I just can NOT stand. I have tried to accept her as she is, but frankly - she is a nasty woman. She is very arrogant, and I am not confusing this with confidence. She is bitchy, treats people like shit, and throws temper tantrums when things don't go her way. Of course, she's the only one who really works and I'm sure she feels like our business is riding on her shoulders. But only when we're successful. Oh yea, she's one of those people that never makes mistakes. Because - when she does - it's always someone elses fault. Not hers.

One time, recently..I heard her refer to me as one of her "besties". I bit my tongue all afternoon. Honey, I am NOT your bestie. I'm pretty sure she was saying that as a lame attempt to make me feel "good". FAIL. I don't need you to feel good. There isn't anything you can do, or say to make me feel bad about myself. I can do that on my own. In fact, I feel better knowing IT'S NOT YOU that makes me feel bad about myself sometimes. (does that make sense?)

Anyway, I tried to extend an olive branch to her today. Brought "party bag" type Valentine's bags for all my co-workers. Including her. You should have seen the look on her face when I handed it to her. She glared at me. She didn't even have the courtesy to say Thank You! See, she's a wicked bitch. I didn't expect an acknowledgement via hand written thank you note. I did expect something other than being glared at - then ignored.

Fine. Feeling is truly mutual, obviously. What I wouldn't do to get the hell out of that place - tomorrow. FOREVER. But, since I make really good money I think I'll stay and make it my personal goal in life to make her life miserable. Which really won't take much, she's already pretty much miserable.

Why dedicate a post to someone I dislike so much? Because the venting helps.

Now - tomorrow's another day. I am a better person than her, and it's my quest to show/prove it to her and to myself.